I was returning home from work on a beautiful autumn evening. I thought to myself that in order for a person to see others, he must be in a good mood. Look, go to work every morning, come in the evening ... Go the same way every day, come. Have you ever asked yourself, as a man, what shops are on the way, who do you meet often, are there trees on the road, and so on. To give a simple example, did I lose my mind counting the stairs of the building I went up and down at least twice a day? It happened once. I counted. Now I forget how many stairs there were. Ashshi, what ...
Yes, I was in the mood. Now everything seemed to me like, "Boy, look at me, do you see me?" he would say. I bit my finger, I understood why. After all, my salary was raised today. And fifty percent. Five years later, my salary was finally raised. I was very happy. It was as if a voice inside me was telling me to take my money and spend it on something. Probably when you have an increase in salary or extra money - we feel rich for a moment because we do not plan how to spend it. But we also know that it will not be like this next month. Because there will be some "bumpers" and that excess income will be used to repay some loans. I was also thinking about where to spend this money, and suddenly an idea came to my mind: Narcissus! My husband. Believe me, you might laugh, but for the last time, it would have been about four or five years since we had eaten together. Now the hospitality is different. But there was no such thing as going somewhere and sitting down to eat.
I hurried home, climbed the stairs, and forgot about the number, and knocked on the door. Yes, I forgot, in addition to buying some things for the house when he arrived, a pineapple for my husband - he loved pineapple - for my son - what was his name? Hmmm ... Yeah, I remembered - I bought a Spiderman dress. Don't laugh because my hands are full, yes, I knocked on the door with my head. As soon as my husband opened the door, I asked how he was feeling. He was also surprised. Every day he came home, I'm sorry to say, he saw me as a tired man like a dog. Sometimes when he brought me tea, he would come and see that I was asleep. He took what I had and told him:
- Nargiz, I have a surprise for you ...!
- What's the surprise? Ada, come in. You're standing here. Talk to you soon and keep up the good content. See how he looks at you ...
- Oh, he forgot ... - I turned my face to my son - Come here, see what the father bought for you?
The poor boy quickly ran over me. I also gave him the dress. Excited, he ran to the other room:
- Yes, Nargiz. My word was incomplete. Get ready for tomorrow, we're leaving.
"Where?" Talk to you soon and keep up the good content.
"I'll take you to dinner."
- Crazy - you smiled - what not to eat? Why did you come home?
- No, it wasn't asobenni, it was supper. See when you don't eat alone, that is, as a family ...
"Ashshi, I'm here, you're here, we're not running away ..." His expression suddenly changed and became more serious. "No need." Go eat with another woman ...
- What woman, moon girl? What am I telling you, what are you telling me. If I had eaten with another woman, would I have eaten you?
- I'm not kidding, this time you will go with another woman, not with me ...
- What woman? What kind of woman are you? - I raised my voice, the child poked his head out of the door and said - Come in!
The poor boy hurried inside.
- You will go with your mother tomorrow instead of me ...
I could not say another word. I don't know if you have such cases or not. Sometimes a word spoken to a person replaces an epic expression. With that word, I understood what my husband was referring to. It would be six months before I could see my mother's face. But I talked to him on the phone. It also takes three to four minutes. What could I say to such a precise word of my husband? He was right.
- Hmm ... - I lowered my head.
***
When I woke up the next morning, I found that my husband had carefully ironed my best clothes and put them on the sofa. His skill and resourcefulness had never changed. He also warned the child not to get close to the clothes. I got up and went to wash my hands and saw that he handed me the phone in his hand. He did not say anything. I understood what he was going to say. I called my mother:
- Hello, hello, how are you?
- Aloo, dear baby, baby lamb, baby's cub, baby. How are you, how are you? I'm fine, thank God.
- I'm fine too. Mama, get dressed, get ready, we're leaving.
"Where?"
- I'll take you to the oppa .. - We started laughing. When I talked to my mother, I was a child. So far, I have not seen a mother joke with her child, but they get offended.
- What about Nargiz, Steel? My son, what are you doing to me, go away from them.
- No, it's not. I'm going with you. Dress up. I'm leaving now. Well thank you.
I put on my glasses and ate my food. There was a familiar cafe, or restaurant, or a place. I thought we would go there. Why there? Because I didn't know any other place. As a child, my mother brought me there a lot. I went there with Nargiz two or three times without breaking this tradition. When my mother arrived, I knocked on the door. He took my mother to the restaurant.
We took my mother to the restaurant. My mother would hug me, sometimes kissing me in the middle of the street, and put her hand on my back to see if I was sweating. I was 35 years old. But my mother treated me like a 5-year-old child. Although I felt uncomfortable, I liked it. It reminded me of my childhood.
My mother and I had a wonderful day that day. True, I ate whatever I ate. My mother didn't eat anything, but she sat down and looked at me. We talked and walked a little. Yes, no matter how much I wanted to buy him something, he did not agree. When he stopped, he told me that it was up to me to come here next time. I will pay for everything. I said, "Oh, God, don't do that." Will you pay me? My wife did not agree, but I agreed. Because I was my mother, I could not agree.
So far, I have never seen anyone eat or walk in a restaurant with my mother. When we were children, our mothers would take us to many places, take us for walks and feed us. But when we grew up, we forgot our parents. He was replaced by his wife. Mother to buy flowers, walk with her, talk, and so on. - It is strange for married people, even single people. But really love to those who do it!
***
Less than six months later, my mother died. Suddenly, suddenly. I did not know how it happened. How could that be? Only six months ago, he was stroking my hair, kissing me, hugging me and laughing. Where did my mother leave me? What would I do without it? The whole world was dark for me that day. I cursed myself that a boy like me would have a black stump. People would come and sit on it, and cats would defile it. Of course, that stump would not harm or harm anyone. He would not be as naughty as me.
Five months after my mother's death, my husband and I decided to go with her to the Mother and Child restaurant. We also took the child and went there together. As soon as I saw it, I lost my appetite as soon as I entered. But I didn't want my family to feel it. We sat down and ate and drank lightly. We ordered the food that the child wanted, and so on. I told the boy there to bring the bill. The boy looked at me and said, "Upside down," but went to another room. Four or five minutes later, a woman came out of the room. I recognized him. The general administrator of the place has been working for several years. He approached us and met us. He put his hand on the child's head and said:
- Your meal bill has been paid.
"What are you talking about, madam?" - I told him in surprise. After all, such a thing could not happen.
- Yes, your mother came here about 5 months ago. He wrote 50 manats and two or three sentences in the middle of the envelope. Come on in, take a look and enjoy yourself!
He showed me the letter in his hand. I opened the letter, it really contained 50 pounds, and a small sheet. I took out a piece of paper and read: "Most likely, my son and daughter-in-law will come here with a child. I promised to invite him to dinner. But I am sick, and my son's work is over. You will be deducted from our food account. If he is not with me, you will deduct their account from this money if he is with his family. "
I looked at the woman, I looked at Narcissus, I looked at the child. I pushed my back and pulled the chair aside. I quickly ran to the toilet. I looked at my face in the mirror and cried. I screamed and sobbed. Why did an illegitimate child like me live in this world? Why?
From there we went to visit my mother's grave.
Farid Abdullah